Facing life’s hurdles can feel overwhelming, but with the right mindset and tools, it’s possible to cultivate resilience and growth. We at the Center for Holistic Psychotherapy aid in working through these with a holistic approach, looking at everyone’s core value and emphasizing different therapeutic techniques.
First, let’s hear from Becca Bongiov, Licensed Resident in Counseling:
Making positive changes in your life often feels very challenging. This does not mean you're not on the right course. I compare it to traversing a long hill. Though the steps may feel burdensome, that does not mean they're not worth it. I combat this by encouraging you to cast your gaze a few steps ahead. Focus on the goal, so you do not lose your drive.
I often see clients who have lost their drive. This often leads people to feeling anxious, depressed, unmotivated, and lost. When our focus gets caught up in negative traps, it's all too easy for our emotions to follow. In addition to other techniques, I practice utilizing Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) techniques, such as Cognitive challenging, refocusing, and reframing. Think about it like this, you wake up to find an inconvenience to start your day. The rest of the day goes well, but if you focus your mind only on that inconvenience, it can seem like a much worse day. If we get stuck in this habit, it can make our daily lives seem much more negative. Bringing focus to the ways we think, can be uncomfortable. But just like a hill doesn't mean you're on the wrong course, this discomfort doesn't mean you're not making a good choice.
Next, Adrienne Gillett, Licensed Resident in Counseling:
One of the hardest but most beautiful things to recognize is that it is okay to not always be okay. As a society we have an unspoken expectation that we need to have everything together and if we don't then we are expected to pretend that we do. But what I have come to realize is that when we recognize these storms of life, when everything isn't okay, we are able to make some of our biggest growth.
There is an analogy of a herd of buffalo in the desert that fits this idea quite well. The concept is that when a storm is coming, rather than trying to outrun it, the buffalo will face the storm and charge directly into it. This not only minimizes the time they spend in the storm but it can also reduce the pain that they may endure. I see the therapeutic journey as quite similar; when struggles emerge and we "aren't okay," our natural instinct is to try and outrun or avoid this storm. But when we choose to face it and recognize when everything isn't okay rather than continue the cycle of avoidance, we are able to begin working through the struggle. While it may be scary and difficult at times, once we are out of the storm we are able to turn around and see the major feat we just conquered.
This is one of the ideas that I use not only in my therapeutic setting but also in my own life. My goal is to create a safe environment where clients feel comfortable to recognize their storms and know that it is okay to not be okay. Together we can face the storm and begin to tackle it head on all while breaking the avoidance cycle and becoming a stronger version of yourself. We all have storms we will endure in life but how we choose to respond to those storms can make a world of difference.
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